starts with Goodbye

I was sitting on my doorstep,
I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand,
But I knew I had to do it,
And he wouldn't understand,
So hard to see myself without him,
I felt a piece of my heart break,
But when you're standing at a crossroad,
There's a choice you gotta make.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

I know there's a blue horizon,
Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me,
Getting there means leaving things behind,
Sometimes life's so bitter sweet.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

Time heals,
The wounds that you feel,
Somehow, right now.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
Starts with goodbye,
The only way you try to find,
It's sad but, sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye,

~ Don't Quit ~

When things go wrong as they sometimes will
When the road your trudging seems all uphill
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but instead you sigh
When worry is pressing you down a bit
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is weird with its twists and its turns
As everyone of us sometimes learns
And many a failure turns about
When you might have won, had you stuck it out
But, don't give up, though the pace seems slow
You may succeed with another go.

Success is failure turned inside out
The silver lining of a cloud of doubt
And you never can tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far
So stick to the fight when your hardest hit
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

~ Author Unknown ~

times gone past

Dreaming of times gone past, when time moved slow, and memories did last.

To sit and watch the sun set down, not driving home with a frown,

With windows open.. smells of pine, no air conditioner unit whine,

No sounds of DS games I hear, just whistling birds delight my ears.

The sights and sounds of small farm life, to hear it now, might ease my strife.

But how to fund this dream of mine? Come on Lord, send me a sign!

-------- Anna Schaar (dated 8/20/2009)

Gym membership...

I have a lifetime gym membership to a local gym... I decided to start going there on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday morning and my first visit was yesterday, a Wednesday. I can say... I was disappointed.

I had hoped to sign up for some individualized training sessions, seeing as I've been a member since 1989, but the service is not free. In fact, it is quite costly, at 49 dollars per session!! So, I decided to warm up on the treadmilll, then maybe do some light weight lifting and call it a day. Even though there were about 25 treadmills, none were vacant so I sat down on a bike to warm up while I waited for a vacancy. The seat was ripped and jagged, and set too low. I reached down to adjust it and found the knob was missing. So, I rode it the way it was. The lady beside me was chatty, though I tried not to respond without seeming rude. I joined a gym to exercise, not socialize, after all.

Finally, after about 10 minutes, a treadmill opens up, so I jump on. I walk for about 20 minutes... while I am walking I realize how very crowded it is on every machine. And it smells of old carpet and sweat. There are women standing around waiting for a turn on many of the weight machines. The isleways are crowded and even though music is playing, it is barely audible over the noise of machines, voices and the large tanning booths located right behind the treadmills. With not enough staff to service all the women here, it would be awhile before I would get any individual attention.

I decide that all this bother isn't really worth it and it will make it an undesirable trip to make three times a week, early in the morning. So I return to the dressing room, change, pack up, and leave. We have workout machines at home, with free weights and a treadmill. I also have some resistance bands that I purchased to get me started on weight training, so I won't hurt my joint ligaments.

So, I will just design my own workout, keep track of how many reps, etc, and how long I work out, and just do this at home. I can turn on my choice of music, there are no chatty neighbors to interupt my workout, and no stale carpet or sweat odors to put up with.

I begin my journey to physical fitness tomorrow! Wish me luck!

Back to college for Spring term...

Well, I begin classes today for the 2nd semester back at college! I'm looking forward to it. I've been so bored over the holiday break!

I will also be starting something else new this week.... I will begin some workouts with a personal trainer at the gym where I have a lifetime membership. I will be going Monday, Wednesday and Friday, hopefully. Some of my classes have lab hours that I have not scheduled yet, but I hope to find time for the gym at least on those three days.

I will post up-to-date information about my physical transformation on this blog. Since I began an 'inner' transformation about a year ago, maybe I will post some thoughts on that as well. We'll see...